Monday, January 31, 2011

Morning of the Earth

to my so blessed heart this right here is THE MORNING of the EARTH. i have and today complete having most physically worked AND SUSTAINED a week, AkA seven or eight days, of quite literally 7 X 12 = 84 hours' ver hard labor. i will say both physical and mental and spiritual and emotional. successfully, clearly, and cleanly in my heart yes heart yes biggly friggin heart to Oh Wordless One.

violated societal liability and liability of the law of heart, laid risk flat and full knowing. in honor of what i know of love, was taught by imperfect parents and given. it is like deciding to go to jail instead of canada seven days in a row. passing on what is

i can give details later. but wanted to record this supine euphoria with which i wake. on/to this

Morning of the Earth

. you, thank you for being my seeming eternal sustainer. love. marty

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

hello, marty, happy new year, dude. dude. wake up!

oh my dear forgotten fellow beings.
i am going to quote an e-mail i just sent:
i am at the moment finding my post-treatment window waiting for potential cancer freedom to be as anxiety ridden and hectic, even daunting, as my diagnosis and treatment period. this i did not expect.
all this to say: my correspondence may be highly irregular, but it is not a reflection of how dearly i appreciate your writing and thought and heart nor a reflection of how precious it is to me to know you.
i believe i am just trying to go back into living life with all my heart. and if i were doing that i would be able to parcel some time to write to you ever couple weeks or so. and i don't seem to be pulling it off. writing you OR living life back there with all my heart. there is something very hard going on. maybe i am taking on too much. soon i will be in my own apartment, i am counting on that being a path to equilibrium. but my patience in getting there is growing so thin i am about played out.
same old tune. i'm still sayin that last pome, three months later.
i think it's time i said "harrass me, i'll respond." love. marty